STYLE:
LOCATION:
DATE:
CONTEMPORARY
HONG KONG
2010
THEMED PRODUCT
Calendars are hilarious yo! A bunch of numbers on a page arranged in a table, which we rip out every now & then. Foolish! I don't wanna rip out part of my life! That not only dumb, that also boring as shite. So with our next task, we had to create a calendar of the year, & we had to do it with some sorta "theme". I was like "Yo teach, what theme do you mean?". He said anything you like! My eyes looked up & I grinned like a manly man, cuz I thought of making a risque calendar! You never wanna rip those out man!! But woah dude, wait just a tick, there are chicks in class, that wouldn't be very classy yo! They'll give me that chick look O_o (I type in HTML code manually, & I just now accidently typed in ‹bra› instead of ‹br›! Bwahaha!!)

So instead I made a cute little monster doing some awesome things. Checkit!
Copyright 2011. Once upon a time, there lived a little monster that could conjure a space-time dimensional vortex, anytime it liked! Little monster could go anywhere in the universe, especially in the homes of little twerps who don't respect the designers CODE OF HONOR! Little monster would then eat up that foo! With hot sauce! Don't worry, I have the perfect repellant to ward of little monster. Just email me - unclebignutbob@gmail.com

OPENING

You know when you kill an animal, skin them, and then spread the skin to dry it? Yeah.

JANUARY

Good times! Tweet! Tweeeeet!! Let's buy cheap champagne & smash it on docked ships to re-christen them! Let's fling used CDs over the ocean to see how it skips! Know what my new years resolution was? It was to be more awesome. It came true.

FEBRUARY

This time of year in my city is a special time. It's when people get free money! Yes. Yes you heard that right. I spent mine on special & classy ladies, for some good wholesome fun.

MARCH

Screw March man! It's foggy, it's misty, it's cold with a 200% chance of thunderstorms. If early Spring was a person, I'd punch it in the face to next month!

APRIL

Since I'm a manly man who works out, I eat lots of eggs on April. Protein builds my muscles & I'm gonna need it for Spring! I have a poster of a.. a bunny, yeah a bunny, with... delicate & umm... curvaceous features to push me further.

MAY

WooHOO!! Spring is here! Blue skies, short-short-pants, sunshine, miniskirts, warm temperatures, giggling chicks... See the design? I like to chase birds.

JUNE

The good thing about the hot weather, is I get to buy a whole tub of ice-cream & proceed to shove it down my throat! I also punch walls & chuck things from my building, like paper airplanes & soapy bubbles.

JULY

Okay don't get me wrong, I like July, the heat blast outside makes chicks wear even skimpier outfits in public. There's just this... this ugly side too y'know. Bugs. Bugs like roaches. Big ones sometimes come in flying through my window!!1! NO FREAKIN' WAY!!

AUGUST

My idea of a good productive time is to go to the beach, like Repulse Bay (we have like many here yo), & eat pizza & scientifically measure the duration of tanning on female subjects wearing a two-piece. I shall also make notes of how many fishies look at me for my pizza.

SEPTEMBER

Contrary to popular opinion on the street, September is actually an awesome shit time! It marks the start of typhoon season!! I go out in signal 8+ in shorts & an umbrella I don't like, & feel the blast wave coming from the eye of the storm! Good times yo.

OCTOBER

With temperatures falling, no more short-short-pants, no more silky white long legs. :( About the only good things around are no more flying cockroaches, & we get burn things in the Lantern Festival!!

NOVEMBER

The burning doesn't have to end yo! This is the time of BBQing, let's burn dead meat! Then eat burnt dead meat, like a BOSS!!

DECEMBER

LEGOs FTW YO!!! I love getting Lego pressies, then munching on Xmas pizza, then inhaling deeply the cold dry air until my nose bleeds. The blood enhances smells & they get imprinted on my memory like.... foreverrrr! So I will NEVER forget!